Mom loves “Wheel of Fortune” host Pat Sajak. She will wave to Vanna, but she talks to Pat. Actually, she interacts with any guy on television - the weatherman, the news anchorman, the talk show host – but just the men. I videotape this activity regularly, as it fascinates me. She really thinks they are talking to her. She thanks the weatherman profusely if it’s been a nice day. When the governor is on with a COVID update, she thinks the sign language interpreters are talking to her as well. She wiggles her fingers back and forth trying to talk to them. I would love to know what her brain is thinking. Even though we have the words scrolling across the bottom of the television, she can’t hear, so she completely misses the point of most conversations. For example, the news anchor will be talking about someone dying of cancer, or a riot somewhere, and she will say “that’s wonderful – thank you!”
Someone recently explained this phenomenon to me, and it makes perfect sense now. When mom was younger (which is how she currently is in her mind), televisions were these big boxes that sat on the floor, and you had to get up and turn a knob to change the channel. Now, we have a large flat screen on the wall, so the people are life size, and the TV is high-definition, so they look very real. She thinks they are personally in the room and talking to her, and no amount of argument can convince her otherwise.
Back to Pat. Every night we watch Wheel of Fortune, to keep her brain engaged in learning, and I’m hopefully staving off my own Alzheimer’s in the process. When I guess a puzzle correctly, she tells Pat, “Julia answered correctly! Send her the money!” Or she asks me “What are we going to do with the money Pat is sending you?” Once I was reading while we were watching and she says “Julia, you’re ignoring Pat – that’s rude!” Another time she got up during the show and left, and I asked her where she was going, and she said “Pat can’t see me sitting over here, so I’m not going to watch.”
Last week, I introduced her to the show ‘Dancing with the Stars’. Mom was a dancer in high school, and she still loves to dance, so I thought she would love seeing the celebrity dancers, and she did. Now if you’ve see the show, you know how skimpy the costumes are – the more skin they show, the better. During one of the dances, mom says “That outfit would look so good on you!” Mom if I were a size two, I wouldn’t be caught dead in that dress. “You need to get it – it would look so nice when you’re out giving your lectures. Why don’t you use all the money Pat is sending you to buy it”?
Mom, do you see a big wheel in our living room??? I’M NOT ON THE SHOW!
“There are only four kinds of people in the world. Those who have been caregivers. Those who are currently caregivers. Those who will be caregivers, and those who will need a caregiver.” ― Rosalyn Carter
And now for an update on the toothbrush situation:
We’re still hiding our toothbrush and, truth-be-told, probably still cleaning the toilet with it. But we’re now storing our necklace with the toothpaste! I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.
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